On the Bad Days

Hi Sugar,

I hope you're in a happy place, with good people and even better friends. I hope you've got that annoyingly positive vibe about you. Smile stuck on your face, eyes full of dreams.

But there are bad days. There are days you want to stay in bed all day, because the world outside seems so cruel. There are days you feel burning hate coursing through you. Days when your heart aches and your eyes aren't dry. I want to say I hope you never have these days, but I know you will.

You know, there is no formula for recovery. There's all that hogwash about picking yourself up and dusting yourself off and making positive decisions and reclaiming your life and leaving the past behind. That stuff might even be true, yet there's a little part of me that doesn't see the difference.

I've had bad days. I've wanted to stay in bed, cry and eat Nutella (that works by-the-way). And no, I haven't fully recovered. I still want to scream hate at times, point out injustices and maybe detest the world a lot.

Aaaaand I survived. Here's a little secret for you. You will survive too. One day, maybe soon even, this gigantic, mammoth pickle is going to be over. It's going to end. That's all. You'll be fine because nothing in this world is permanent and problems & heartaches are temporary. Finish crying and tell yourself that.

You know what happens after that? You'll be a little wiser, a lot more careful and ready for your next gigantic, mammoth pickle. You will survive any hell that life throws at you, not just because you're one helluva fighter, but because you'll only have to fight a little more.

You're my brave, strong and ferocious girl. Keep fighting.

Till next time,
Mummy